Fresh start. New me. No do-overs. Day 3/4

Day 3 was challenging. After a difficult work day, I was left feeling over worked and under appreciated…AGAIN. And, looking for something deep fried and chocolately. I resisted though. 

I came home had a super sensible dinner, no dessert, no alcohol, and no desperate contact with the guy. Even though my rough day was pushing me back towards him. It’s not like he’s my soft spot, though. It was more wanting the familiar back. But, I didn’t…not him. I did initiate a couple texts with the crush, but nothing that led to my emotional hole, in tears. 

Day 4 started out strong. My Advocare order arrived last night, and I dove into the box like Christmas. I reviewed everything and committed to starting the program today. Feeling confident. Feeling strong. Feeling prepared for success. 

Starting my work day late, apprehensive. Waiting for the other shoe to drop, the new chaos, and what fire will appear today. 

Slipped up and talked myself into sending a text today. “You’re grown, girl. You can say, “hi.” He may have been on your mind for a reason.” It wasn’t a good idea. It’s wasn’t a bad idea, but it wasn’t necessary. I need to get him out of my system. It failed. It’s done. Let it go. 

Spent most of the morning building the blueprint to my empire and chatting with the crush. Is this going anywhere? I have no idea. Right now, I just like what’s happening in the moment. He’s cute. He’s funny. And, we have these phenomenal conversations about everything. 

Day ended on a more sour note. 

Dealt with some friend stuff I wasn’t equipped to handle. Hard to see someone self destructing in front of you. 

Ended my work day feeling overwhelmed. 

And, came home to realize my house hadn’t cleaned itself. 

I made some bad food decisions at the end of the day, but I took every supplement I needed and knocked out almost 12,000 steps. 

Tucking in my emotions for Day 5.  

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