I recently ended a short lived romance. I met this guy right after I moved back home, and we quickly hit it off. We knew a number of the same people, and we have some similar interests. All the makings of a beginner courtship, right?
Shortly after our first few dates and conversations, his life blew up in his face. Royally. His ego, finances, and stability took a major hit. He was grumpy. He was on edge. He was a different person.
We stopped talking regularly. I’d had enough patronizing and aggressive conversations from “Mr. Brand New” to last me a life time.
But, I hadn’t.
And a month or so later, I ventured out and sent him a text. Something “…I wish you well,” type message. I was feeling lonely, I’m sure. And, maybe his personality changes were caused by his life circumstances. He responded, and we were instantly back in the first interactions. There was a connection.
Then, he started reminding me of all the issues we’d had on our first run. He can come across incredibly arrogant and patronizing. There’s lots of pettiness and stubbornness between us, too. It’s exhausting and overwhelming. It’s silly and pointless.
And, I had a moment of realization. It’s been a hot minute. There is no reason for us to have any resemblance of drama this early into the honeymoon. If you can’t maintain the peace, if we can’t maintain the peace, at the beginning someone is sure to have a pending case within the first year. So, I wanted back out. I answered the last few questions I’d avoided to keep from making a mountain out of a mole hill. I voiced my concerns and my desire to walk away. He understood. He couldn’t have been enjoying the misery, either.
Then I deleted our text change. Kept his contact information. However, I changed his company to “remember how it ends.”