There’s nothing more painful, in that moment, than seeing your past happily out with their new present. It’s devastating. It’s like being kicked in the gut, and it takes everything you’ve got to maintain your composure. It’s a fight or flight moment, and your legs feel like gelatin, your heart is racing, your head is firing off thousands of memories, and the situation is closing in on you.
You want her to slap his face. You want her to instantly hate him. You want her to be furious for any reason. Because the look of devastation on his face would be the only thing that could make everything better.
And one day, maybe, his FB status changes to single. You just happened to notice or someone messy tells you. She’s gone. He’s alone, and probably upset. And, you feel amazing.
Just don’t go back.
Because your closure is his unhappiness.
Sounds awful, and it kinda is.
But, the very best remedy to my broken heart is your broken heart. It’s better than any apology. Having the opportunity to witness or know you’re devastated, makes all my pain lessen. It’s true.
This is another of those times I’m saying what other people are thinking and refuse to say. It’s not cute or kind, but it’s true.
Reverse of that is…
You’re out, with the new guy. You’re having a comfortable time enjoying the newness of your relationship. Then, you spot him. It’s the past, and you knew that you’d run into him again, but you didn’t expect it to happen like this. You were supposed to be dressed to impress with a full face of make up and surrounded by 10 handsome men attending to your every need. You’re just hanging out. Casual. And, you’re with him, the present. A part of you feels great. This is the next closest thing to your original plan.
But, you loved him. And, the sad look on his face seeing you out with the present stings a little. You didn’t want to hurt him, as much as you wanted to be free of his chaos.
Now, it’s fight or flight. He saw you. He saw you happy. He saw you with the present, and that’s enough. You’re done. That’s your closure. Because in that moment he realized that he lost an amazing woman in you, you are no longer an option, and he screwed up.
His unhappiness is your closure.