If you are competing with his deceased wife, YOU WILL LOSE!
In death, most people become saints. Her sins have been forgiven, and he’s going to mourn her forever.
You are still around to make mistakes. You lose.
This was all prompted by a conversation I had with a friend recently. She’s involved with a single dad who lost his wife during child birth. And although she does what she can to support them, it’s often met with accusations of wanting to replace the deceased, primarily by her family.
Step back. If you love him, and this child, you will wait when needed and give them the time necessary…all parties involved (this means her family). This doesn’t mean you leave the relationship or take unnecessary hits. It merely means that you tuck your feelings in, and don’t make the mourning about you.
Easier said than done? Quite possibly.