That’s all I got. It’s too hard. You’re too much. I can’t get emotionally involved the same way I did before. It’s overwhelming.
I love hard. I love with conviction and ignorance. I’m committed and willing to weather any storm that comes our way. Until it ends.
The end always brings a moment of reevaluation. After I pick my self up off the floor, I can start to see us for who and what we are.
And…I can’t do it again. I can’t be your greatest cheerleader. I can’t support you unwaveringly and be everything. I can’t love you despite your faults. I can’t stand in the trenches with you or take on the world.
I just can’t.
Because when I was prepared for that, you weren’t.
Don’t get me wrong, I’m not saying I’ve done all or even any of those things. However, it’s the sacrifice I was willing to make. I can’t be that girl anymore though. It’s just too much now. I can’t gear up for that, because you weren’t interested in that when I offered it to you.
Our past is the best representation of our future.